Start the year off with nothing going professionally, getting pushed and pulled all over from San Francisco Branch to Hayward Ops (residential lending) to Fremont Branch to Hayward Branch (having an office!) to Hayward Ops (residential). I gained some responsibility, but the worst recession in a good long time hit and I have been chasing after late payments ever since.
Personally, this year was a really big blow. Melissa started getting sick with acid reflux and we ended up getting married on April 18th in Santa Rosa, since she needed medical coverage. That isn't the only reason (we had been living together for 5 years and I love her more than anyone in the world), but it was the impetus.
Almost right after that, my grandmother Dottie on my Mom's side died after battling cancer and diabetes for years. I was extremely close with her. She helped raise me and really helped shape my outlook on life. She was a vibrant and intelligent woman and still get upset when I think about her. She is always in my thoughts and it really hurts even now.
Only a short time later, her husband, my grandfather, Dwight passed on as well. This hurt, but not as much. I think part of it is I had been expecting him to pass. He smoked for years and I am surprised he lasted as long as he did. I think I was ready for him much more than I was ready for my grandma.
The one good out of them passing is that I think my Mom, sister, step-dad, Melissa and I all became closer than we already are. It may have been that my grandparents were so central to our lives that once they were gone, we all closed in, like a black hole will suck things in. I know this sounds sort of negative, but I mean it in the most sincere sense that I feel closer to all of them because of this loss. It is one of the few things I treasure from this year.
I suppose you could look at the bright side and say that some good things happened, too. But I just can't help but think this was the worst year of my life. The positive in all of this is that it could have been so much worse.
1 comment:
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